Tag Archives: queer

Hold it! Beat it!

I live in San Francisco and like too many cities, we face the loss of our daily newspaper. Fortunately we here are blessed with two thriving weekly gay newspapers that you can pick up every Thurs for free. These papers will someday be the only source of national and local news in San Francisco. Almost like the SF Chronicle except with bare-chested men on the front page. 2barechestI’d like to thank the masseurs of San Francisco for supporting our GLBT press with your advertising. If I ever have back pain or need an escort I know where to find one. I have talented friends who write for these papers but we can’t agree on everything which brings me to the following item in yesterday’s edition –

 “RIP the greatly gifted Michael Jackson . When all the late-night jokes about pet chimp Bubbles , the Jesus juice, and Jacko’s other eccentricities have died away, what remains is a showman for the ages. He did the term “queer artist” proud.”

No.. No.No. REWIND. Stop the gay presses. That last line has got to go. Who said anything about MJ being queer or proud? I just participated in the National Queer Arts Festival with hundreds of proud queer artists.  The term “queer artist” means you state you are queer in in a direct way. Wearing one glove is not enough. MJ was a tragic damaged genius who married Lisa Marie Presley , Debbie Rowe and hung a baby (maybe his) out the window. Things that queer artists would not be proud to do.. except occasional baby dangling, but only in New York. Michael Jackson had a period of great artistry. I would have been interested in what his summer tour and new album would have been like.

I only love about half of his music but I will concede  MJ’s creative legacy is up there with the greats. However he will never be inducted into the Queer Artist’s hall of Fame. Let’s review. He was batshit crazy for years, maybe he had sex with underage boys and married fag hags. None of that disqualifies him from being considered a queer artist – but it doesn’t qualify him either. The fact that all our gaydar was abuzz when we first saw him moon walk and we believe that his life would have been better if he came out doesn’t make him queer. He never said he was gay. He pretended, however lamely, to be straight. Michael was at best, or worst, a ‘closeted  artist.’ Don’t present him to our LGBT youth as role model. Michael is an example of what -not to do- in your personal life. And as one of the ‘queer artists’ who have been putting ourselves out there at the cost of wealth and fame let us keep our standards please. But I do miss MJ.

What do you think readers?

I Kissed Annie Sprinkle

(San Francisco, May 30th) Tonight I dropped some quips about  Sonia Sotomayor backlash and Rush Limbaughs Oxycotin relapse at the Radar Fantastical Benefit to raise funds to send twelve emerging queer writers to a house in Mexico to get inspired, tequila not included. The event at the fabulous Muse Gallery was sold out and a literate, punky, queer and sexy crowd enjoyed readings by heroes of queer lit Dorothy Allison and Eileen Myles and star of avant garde drag Suppository Spelling. 

International sensation, multimedia artist, and PHD Sexologist Annie Sprinkle showed up to light her nipples on fire and help with Radar’s big raffle. Winning tickets were drawn from Annie’s cleavage. I’m proud to say that Annie is a friend but I hadn’t heard from her since she lost all her possesions due to a terrible fire on  her houseboat. Annie wasn’t there at the time so we can’t blame her nipples. After that she began touring all over the world spreading her message of sexual good cheer. On Saturday I was reminded of what a genuine fun person she is. You always want to have an Annie Sprinkle in your life. As we were chatting Annie said something  that my oppurtunist little brain seized upon as a great publicity quote. I asked if she would say it on camera and she, trusting soul that she is, followed me to the quietest spot in the party for this testemonial which can only be viewed on a computer.Sorry mobile users.  

Thanks Annie. You Rock! 

 Dorothy Allison introduced a new piece called Porcelain (bathroom sex and gardening) by saying that the best thing to do for new writers is to share something ” that isn’t fixed yet.” Loved that. May borrow that line when I don’t make my deadlines. Host Michelle Tea wore the most attention getting dress of the night. Wish I could show you but I forgot I had a camera. I was so dazzled. Later on renowned photographer Deb St. John offered to use my IPhone to take a picture of me with Chelsea Starr, DJ, and  the winner of SF Weekly’s 2009 Most Fashionable Person Award. 

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