Not Too Swift Taylor

I’m still kicking folks. I’ve been preparing material for a Christmas show in NYC on Saturday Dec 19. http://www.elmuseo.org/en/event/coquito-cabaret-holiday-extravaganza-latina-divas-marga-gomez-carmelita-tropicana and for the Marga Gomez New Year’s Eve Spectacular in San Francisco  http://events.sfgate.com/san-francisco-ca/events/show/89837785-the-marga-gomez-new-years-eve-spectacular

But yesterday after a radio interview in San francisco I took these pictures on public transit. Let this be a lesson to never get lost in the music. I wish I had a video camera because this guy was so-mazing and oblivious. He was blasting Taylor Swift on his head phones. Yes he was.

He’s doesn’t have a seizure. He’s into his Ipod.
“She wears short skirts
I wear t-shirts
She’s cheer captain
I wear sneakers…..” Laughing on a park bench
Thinking to myself
Hey, isn’t this easy?Hey what you doing
With a girl like that
“I’m listening to the kind of music
She doesn’t like
She’ll never know your story
Like I do”

Rocky Road

I spaced out and missed a deadline to apply for a NACA conference that I stood a good chance of getting. This might have made me financially solvent next year with all the college gigs you can get by auditioning. I’ve been sitting with this news for two hours. It feels tight in my heart. But I know I’ll be fine. I have great things ahead and I’ll find another way to play colleges next year. I need an intern.

I bought a big hunk of  milk chocolate rocky road and I’m self medicating with it. Tonight I’ll be at the Rrazz Room catching up with by good friend Rene’ over dinner before we  watch Dick Gregory interviewed by Mort Sahl . At least I found a good day to realize my huge blunder. I need to laugh babies. Well that’s it kids, my downer blog.  Forget this one and read yesterday’s it’s super upbeat.

My Browser

I started getting my brows waxed late in life. I’d like to quit early. It hurts. I go to Patty every month. She’s a fast waxer and to keep me from hyperventilating she asks me questions about my career as she lays the hot stuff on my head. Then I answer her and wince as she yanks. Sometimes she leans on me to really get in there with my brows. By lean I mean she plants her crotch firmly on my knee which temporarily relieves my anxiety. I used to go to Nadine. She got the worst of me. I’d show up for Nadine stressed out and skittish like I was about to see the dentist.

I’m way overdue at the dentist. Keep losing my nerve. I’m afraid of everything in that office. I’m afraid when the dentist lectures me  about my teeth. I’ve asked her not to tell me what’s happening in my mouth. Just give me gas, valium and novacaine and do what you want in there Doc. I even get gas for teeth cleaning. And I always bring music to listen to so I can’t hear my own screams.

I am a nitrous oxide pig. Crank up the laughing gas.  It can make a miserable experience fun until my dentist yells at me to keep my mouth open and breathe through my nose. Geez I can’t remember the last time I went to my dentist but I’m pretty sure that I listened to music on my discman. And I’ve had an Ipod for… That is not good.  I also have a vague almost repressed memory of getting kind of romantic on the laughing gas and rubbing her leg. My dentist looks like Mary Tyler Moore and always wears skirts under her lab coat. But that’s not why I haven’t been back.

I can’t stand her dental assistant. She’s an annoying motor mouth who thinks that an off duty comic spitting out blood is there to make her laugh. Worst of all she wants to get her lumpy son into show business and sees me as their ticket to Hollywood.

When I lived in Hollywood I went to the same dentist who worked on Stevie Wonder. She said Stevie flew her to gigs and he flossed regularly. I wish I could go to her again or somebody.  I better find another dentist soon. I need teeth to go with my brows.

Goodnight Walter

Walter Cronkite was the last newscaster with a moustache.

Pound Cake Girl

When I was a baby I could stay up until the 11 o’clock news. That’s when my mom or the babysitter would say “Walter Cronkite” and I would get in my pjs, have some pound cake and go to bed. Pound cake became so unpopular. Nobody wants to think about pounds when they eat cake. But my mom wanted me to have cake and ice cream at bedtime because in those days having a chubby kid made you look rich. Now I can stay up all night because I don’t have my Cronkite curfew.

Latino kids in NY stay up late. You’ll see our groggy babies with the headband bows, over the new tuft of dark hair in strollers at midnight. Later the babies will be but to bed nestled amongst the coats in the one dark room at the party. “Put your coat in there. Shh. Don’t wake the baby!” That’s how we roll.

My former therapist advised me not to send out business emails at 3am because people frown on it. I don’t understand that kind of thinking. But I took her word for it. Now if there’s something important to email I’ll stay up till 6am to send it, giving the impression that I was up with the chickens. I’m leaving for gigs in London and Scotland in a week and enjoy these communications greatly because they are 8 hours ahead of me and I can call them at 2am my time for phone meetings.

You Say Potato…

Hi Readers! Today was the busiest day ever on my blog according to the wordpress stats. ‘More Marga’ just passed 4000 views. I still don’t know enough about how blogs work but I think you can subscribe by clicking “Blog Info”in the top right corner. Thanks for the encouragement. Now for today’s topic.

I posed this question today on Twitter and to random shoppers at Trader Joes in San Francisco.

Didn’t we used to say LGBT? Now it’s always GLBT. Anybody else notice this?

What do you think Readers? Please add your comments to the discussion. Here’s what people have been saying so far.

DM said “I like the GBLT myself, with a slice of cheese!”

LS said “Life was so much easier when we were just “filthy homosexuals”

JP said “My vote for the all-inclusive MOjority didn’t get enough votes at the Gay Agenda meeting.”

LM said  “My meditation center’s name for our queer sangha is the “alphabet sangha”.

NM said “you’re thinking maybe it’s a reflection of the natural inclination some people have in a patriarchal society of putting males in a position of primacy or something?

EGP said “it’s a not so subtle slap back…sounds better, historically accurate… LGBT forever.”

SJH said “Wow, I thought it was still LGBT, but then again, I still think “icy” means “hella fresh.”

My journalist/comic/actor/screenwriter friend Mark said “I remember originally there was no “L” at all  then the “L” was put in front around 94. Lately, yes, I agree it’s changed back. After cursory research it looks as if the last change in the AP style guide re gays was in 2006 and that change was informed by GLAAD. The AP style guide did not put forth a preference for what the communicty calls itself, i.e. LGBT or GLBT or otherwise.  ANybody got the 2009 or 2010 Ap guide? Otherwise magazine editors make these choices so far as I know.”

My friend Mark assumed I would know what the AP style guide was. I’m guessing it’s either Associated Press or Always Proud. As our community becomes more diverse we oughtta come up with one simple and cool way to refer to ourselves. Maybe a an egyptian symbol like Prince as in formerly known as LGBTGLBT.

And finally LM proposes this. “I like queer. An ex of mine had an elderly relative who used the term “artistic” with a wink and a nod. I think that’s quite nice too.”